Episode 86 - Mastering Your Mind: How Dr. Robb Kelly Helps Men Unlock Their Full Potential

In this compelling episode of Maxed Out Man, Kevin Davis interviews Dr. Robb Kelly, a leading psychologist and neuroscientist specializing in addiction recovery and peak performance. Dr. Kelly shares his inspiring personal story of overcoming alcoholism and living on the streets before becoming a world-renowned expert in trauma and behavior. 

Throughout the episode, he emphasizes the importance of addressing childhood trauma and rewiring the brain to unlock one’s full potential. Dr. Kelly’s no-nonsense approach to recovery, paired with cutting-edge neuroscience techniques like brain spotting and somatic experiencing, has led to a 97% success rate in his programs. The conversation explores the dynamics of success, mindset, and how men can overcome their past to achieve greatness.

Key Takeaways:

1. Childhood Trauma’s Impact: Unresolved childhood trauma can hold men back from reaching their full potential, even if they’re unaware of it.
2. Rewire the Brain: Using neuroscience, men can reprogram their subconscious minds to break self-sabotaging behaviors and unlock their potential.
3. No Excuses: Dr. Kelly stresses the importance of commitment and accountability in both recovery and entrepreneurship—there’s no room for weak excuses.
4. Success Requires Aggressiveness: Dr. Kelly’s aggressive, results-oriented approach demands full commitment from clients, leading them to break through barriers and achieve success.
5. Live in the Now: True fulfillment comes from living in the present moment, not getting stuck in the past or worrying about the future.

To learn more about Maxed Out Man and to maximize your potential, visit www.maxedoutman.com or connect with us on Social Media:

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Transcript

0:00
so as crazy as it may seems to you you will self- sabotage some business deals without you knowing your self Saab you
0:07
think I've done my bet now you have welcome to maxed out man helping
0:14
you become the man you were made to be hey guys this is Kevin Davis from the
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max time man podcast I'm going to be here today with Dr Rob Kelly he and I have been trying to connect for a little
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while so we both agree this is going to be super good uh so so I hope you'll listen along and stick with us like I
0:33
say some of these are just for my own edification and then you guys get to listen along and this is definitely going to be one of those I'm super
0:38
excited about this one before I get started want to remind you guys to go to MaxOut man.com I do have some space on
0:44
some of my coaching programs we've got some courses coming out soon and uh and other things so make sure you go check
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that out and see what we've got going on over there let me read Dr Rob's uh quick
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bio which is actually kind of extensive but I want to get through it because I think it's all pertinent information uh Dr Rob's a psychologist and
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neuroscientist from the Rob Kelly Recovery Group a tella Health Neuroscience coaching company with holy
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crap a 97% success rate uh not a lot of people can boast that Dr Rob has an
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amazing story of how he successfully overcame addiction and helps others reach their potential they work uh with
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patients to improve their Optimal Performance by using brain spotting and somatic experiencing so dude we have so
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much to talk about there Dr Rob provides mentorship and guidance to inspiring entrepreneurs uh who that's I am one of
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those so this is exciting for me he devotes countless hours sharing his expertise through conferences and
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workshops utilizing others who've overcome challenges associated with Lifestyle Changes habit formation
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childhood trauma startup obstacles Etc he also Fosters a culture of innovation
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and responsible risk-taking and if you're not watching this on video he
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also has an amazing pair of eyeglasses on right now so make sure you go over to
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YouTube and check out the videos so you can see those I love those man those things are great uh welcome I'm super
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excited for you to be here and talk about all this stuff my uh my daughter
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in the spring will graduate with her Neuroscience degree so I'm sure she'll be all about listening to this episode
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um and so she's kind of finishing up that stuff so so I've had a bit of experience learning from her overtime
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about this stuff so welcome thanks for coming awesome man thanks for having me
2:36
I'm looking forward to this it's going to be good yeah so that's our LinkedIn bio right like that's the that's the the
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pr bio but let's find out I want to get your full story and take as long as you
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want I know there's addiction and recovery and helping people and all of that in there that gives us an
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opportunity and gives me an opportunity to really get to know more about you yeah so it all started back in the day
2:59
I'm from England in case you thought I was from South Texas been over there for about 18 years
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I I Dallas for 14 years and then moved to San Antonio to try and retire but I
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didn't work out we just got bigger and bigger uh some people are terrible at retirement you must be one of those well
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my dad always told me this and I've never forgot it Kevin is the day retires the day you die and I've seen it so many
3:26
times with so many times it's like when you retire why don't you start an Empire you know it was not that easy it really
3:31
is that easy but when you know about the new science behind most people walk around 40 to 60% of their capability so
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um suffered from alcoholism uh when I was young took my first drink at nine uh
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musician on stage with my musical family my Auntie and Uncle I remember the day as if it was yesterday took the first
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drink because I was nervous my uncle gave it to me and uh yeah just you know
3:56
went great for years and years alcohol as my best friend they give me confidence uh I went to college nobody
4:03
in my family's been to college before you know I was achieving all these great things and then around 24 25 years old
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26 around that area um it all went to [ __ ] you know it just savagely took me
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uh to the streets and I lost everything I lost my kids I lost my wife houses
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cars I lost everything and I was abandoned on the street I seven suicide
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attempts and on two occasions it worked I was dead so people say today why why' you take risky chances like I died twice
4:34
on the streets do I have to what why why wouldn't I you know I've been given two
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lives in one lifetime is the way I see it so you know I just grew up in Manchester and um went down to Oxford to
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get educated and then get back to Manchester a few years and then came over here but during that time obviously
4:56
uh you know the the streets and stuff like that you see I from the projects
5:01
where you were brought up to fight I was a bodybuilder and uh MMA before MMA come
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out is called bare knuckle fighting with the gypsies The Travelers I used to love that stuff you know so when I was
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homeless I could take care of myself even though I was drunk most of the time I could take care of myself but as the
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days went on and the weaker I got from not eating but just drinking alcohol eventually I got my teeth knocked out my
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nose broken you know stuff like that but uh I also to myself Kevin if I ever got
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up the street I will spend the rest of my life helping families and patients uh
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to to recover from alcoholism and addiction but what we found as a whole
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is five years ago 95% addiction 5% entrepreneurs now it's 95% entrepreneurs
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people find out who they are uh childhood trauma depression and building Empires with build with and 5% uh
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alcohol and addiction because we deled into the neuros science behind everything and it was
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like I've worked with about 9,000 people over the years I'm not just a fly by
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night you know I've work with 10 people you know what our program is the only program that offers a money back guarantee if you don't want if you don't
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achieve what we tell you you're going to achieve which is your dream and 98% success rate you know we're very we're
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bordering on aggressive to get you to the place where you want to go and we've never failed yet so yeah that's
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me I I want to dig into I want to dig into so much of that but but since this was the last thing you said tell me what
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bordering on aggressive means because I've been accused of being that way I had somebody yesterday tell me I was on
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the phone with him and he made some statement and I just basically blasted him for it you know quote unquote in a
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loving way and he said dude you are so one of those people that love you when
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you need to be loved and will stab you in the face when you need to be stabbed
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love it that's me yeah I've not got time one thing I hate in this world and Hate's a strong word but I'm gonna say
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hate is weak man can't if you're not my guy go away if you want to achieve come on I've got all day I'll love you I'll
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give you the [ __ ] off my back but don't sit there you know criticizing me for raising my voice when I'm all excited
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and ready to go you know he's oh you he shouting too loud go somewhere else I
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don't care I don't need your money I don't want your money but if you come on board we're going to get you there you
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know so I just aggressive for me means that we're going to go to any length to
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make sure you get where you're going and I've worked with anybody use anybody out there I I work with movie stars
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entrepreneurs film star I work with musicians that's my full time I can't sh as doctor's day I only have three
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patients every three months that's all I deal with and the rest of the company deal with you know we got psychotherapists and coaches deal with
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with the general public but yeah I I will fight total so with whatever stopping you um you're ready so you got
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to come ready guys I think we the only company again that has an assessment even for entrepreneurs I we go through
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what your what you what how willing are you to do everything we take to do and we've turned down more people than we've
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taken on and people go you're crazy you know I mean I turned down a famous pop
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star for a million dollars Dallas Texas in Camp's restaurant I had two 00 $300
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in the bank and I turned her down because she wasn't ready and the next weeks she shaving of heads and all that
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stuff it's like we do what we do because we we love what we do but we're but we're very good at what we do and that's
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why you know we have we have a sliding scale for general public but that's why people you know are pay extortionate
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amounts of money to work with me because that's my worth yeah yeah and that's you know that's the level of success and you
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you know in anything whether it's me with my wife or or another guy with his
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wife it has to be something to where you're fully committed and both parties have to be committed if you guys are
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committed on your side and the person is committed on their side then you can have success but if you only half ass it
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you know I always tell my girls make sure you use your whole ass no half no half assing anything right yeah um what
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would you describe you use the phrase weak men and I'd love to get your take on
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what that look looks like versus what it looks like to be a strong man because we talk you know obviously on this thing we
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talk a lot about masculinity and like this holistic approach to masculinity
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and what it means to be strong I tend to lean and I've said this on the podcast many times I tend to lean towards alpha
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male right like I'm more traditional and and work out and know how to build crap
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and build cars and all that stuff so I would consider my and however I treat my
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wife like a princess and and ser her in every possible way so I would consider
10:01
that being strong uh and I hustle and have nine you know eight companies and
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all that stuff but I want to get your definition of that and how that plays out the weak men are the guys that we
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don't have cry rooms by the way any of my offices around the world we don't we don't stand for none of that [ __ ] if
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you're going to come in give it all stand up be a man be a leader you know really Inspire other people you know
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don't go on having Affairs behind everyone's back or beating your wife up that's not a man that's a weak man I don't like like them guys is stand up
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and anybody can be a strong man you know with with with the things that we have you've just said it we look after our
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wives you know alpha male you know what me and you walk into a room people know we've walked into the room we don't have
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to shout or do nothing that that's a strong man a strong man who sits with his babies and tells Mercy Rhymes a
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strong man that'll you know play football with his kid you know all these things that we do as a parent and as a
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man we do it proudly and we don't take any [ __ ] off anybody that's that's me
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and that's you I can you can tell that by just looking at you Kevin you don't have to say anything you don't taking
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[ __ ] of anybody you know you just know you know that's that's my guy that's the PE that's the people that me and you are
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fighting to get back into this world because we seem to have lost that a little bit over the years now if you're
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not prepared to do that I don't care I I'm not saying you're go do what you do
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man but I seek out the guys that are owning up to their responsibilities and acting the proper
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way act accordingly dress accordingly and speak accordingly and anybody can do
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this you know it's free of charge your childhood trauma might be keeping you back you don't have to be built like
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Kevin and I you know you don't have you could be like 80 pounds and be a freaking leader you know it's an inside
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job what's in here are you constantly lifting people up helping people showing
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people that hey look this is what I do patient wants in the day I'm literally hands and knees scrubbing the floor cuz
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we had to stay night and like oh my God what are you doing scrubbing the floor why why why don't you just s all clean
12:06
the Dess I'm not going to ask anybody to do what I'm not prepared to do so that's how I describe both of them it's like
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stand up for what you're about and stand up strong and Shout It Out Loud if you need to but the kind and
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loving and shirt off my back man I give $150,000 a year back to the community
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that need help you know the less than 4 can't afford groceries de we just put it back into the community man because it
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it makes me feel good and I'm blessed to be here anyway I died twice on the streets so yeah that's that strong man
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is is is my guy you know but we will work with people that are not there 100%
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you got to be willing man that's the difference you're either in or you're out there's no middle of the road we're
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not a a cocky Factory you don't sugar coat [ __ ] over here you're either make it or you're not that's kind of what the
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assessment is about and if you don't make it I don't care if you come on to us I'm your G and you become part of my
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family but if your parents come along like we've done loads of times in Dallas with a huge checkbook getting little
13:13
Johnny to come on because he might stay out of court go away what go to treatment or go I'm not you
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guy what does that assessment look like for you guys like can you give me some of those you know I don't want to give
13:26
away the farm or anything but I'm curious like and let's frame it in context of like hey I want to understand
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if I'm the kind of guy that is willing to do what it takes right not
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necessarily willing to work with you which is you know a byproduct obviously but I want to know kind of what that
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looks like as a as a guy or as a woman that's listening to this we predominantly men or and the women that
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love them that's what we say right yeah yeah you know the the assessment is
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anything from three minutes to three hours you know it's a flat fee for it and what I'm looking for I'm looking for
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you being here for the wrong reasons uh let's take a real easy one which was and
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and like I say 5% is drugs alcohol we don't really deal with that a lot anymore but uh couple com in very
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wealthy couple with the son uh 16 years old uh texes oxyen all that stuff can't
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stop he wants to come he's he's a couple of days clean he's parents are very proud we bring him in for the assessment
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this is this is part of I get to I knew he wasn't in by the way he was acting a second PhD first went psychology
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secondly Behavioral Science so when he sits down I know he's not here for the right reasons so I said to him Hey
14:37
listen you want to start Monday it's Thursday oh yeah yeah yeah I'll start Monday yeah so well here's the deal I've
14:43
got two Xanax in my drawer from another patient we had to take it off what if me and you bang Xanax now to chill out for
14:50
a bit meet on Monday we start again he's like oh my God yes I stood up walked out the parents and say he's not he's we we
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don't want to take him and they go but Dr Ro oh they get the checkbook out you
15:01
can't buy our services you have to earn them I spent so much time Kevin working
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with people I didn't want it I spent so much time giving my services free and do you know where he got me nine years ago
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in a freaking psychiatric or that's why he got it so if you're not ready I don't want to know and we'll we'll pull all
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sorts of stuff on the assessment but Mo mostly guys because I have a reputation now they turn up like you you know
15:26
they've tried everything else they know they're only doing 70% and they can get to 100% uh by working with us them guys
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that know what the deal is StreetWise guys love StreetWise guys you know I've
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got obviously behind me educated from the best universities in the world nothing doesn't mean anything today what
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means things is is they're living on the street they're bringing up the the StreetWise knowing be StreetWise and clever and be able to talk to people so
15:50
that's the assessment and the quickest one has been a minute and the longest one has been 36 minutes and we'll take
15:57
him on but you we ain't afraid to fire you or anything like that that's in the contract if you start acting an idiot
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and don't do what you tell us to do because my reputation is online my percentage and my money back guarantees
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on the line we will fire you man and you ain't getting no refund here you know you're either in or you're out and
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that's part of that commitment right like that's that's a big part of what that means do you find and I want to get
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into the mindset stuff and and your research and those kind of things also but do you find that people that come
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from challenging backgrounds tend to falter more or tend to reach in and and
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lean into to overall success it's funny because I talked to so many entrepreneurs and there's this there's
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kind of this dichotomy between like all right it takes money to make money so you have some major entrepreneurs that
16:47
you know their parents were loaded and and they happen to have a good and they put the work in but they had that safety
16:53
net right I'm literally trailer trash grew up in a trailer park yeah drugs and
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alcohol in my in my family and and all that stuff and so that taught me some of
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a lot of most of what I know about you know hustle and I don't really like that word but working hard and dealing with
17:12
failure and challenges and all that is that kind of what you see overall yeah we see less privileges
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making it just like me and you because they got a drive they got hunger once they understand when we work on the
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Neuroscience Park that they're capable of doing that and it's always been the opportunity I've always been around
17:29
Haven seen it they're the guys because you look at there's four entrepreneurs out there that are billionaires right
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now all all came through in this company all started with nothing it's like when you already have money like I don't know
17:41
a politician right now his father give him million dollars to start a company back like 40 years ago 50 years ago it's
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like it's good but you don't have the hunger you know and and America likes a comeback story I've learn that as well
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you know I if you if you don't have uh if you haven't been through this stuff I've been through we don't employ you
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unfortunately you know we just don't because you have to know how to help somebody but you have to have gone through it so if you're an entrepreneur
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you kind of have to gone through bankruptcy or no money in your life so you can educate others because this is
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what it's about when you start people come well I earn a million dollars a year my question is why aren you earning
18:18
two well I'm at my Peak no you're not how do you know I'm I'm a pink you
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haven't worked with me and I know that sounds arrogant Kevin but the years and years I'm 63 years old now don't take
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any [ __ ] of anybody you know I tell you the truth like it is I've just lost 1557 because I came off TV about six
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years ago kind of weight problem I've sort it out me back on TV it's like this is what you guys can do it's 100%
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guaranteed that once you go through our program and understand what the brain and the conscious and subconscious brain
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central nervous system is all about you'll be a guest of what you can actually do so coming out of a wealthy
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family it's kind of already there you kind of made your money you've got that blanket Arnold SW and gomy never have a
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plan B that's what he told me years 1979 when I I was picked him up from the
19:11
airport and drove him to the hotel I was a bodybuilder back in the day he says never have a plan B so when people come
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to me it's plan a only we don't talk about Plan B don't it doesn't exist in us because the mindset and Neuroscience
19:25
and quantum physics backs us up here when we do the work and set of mind you can do anything that you want to do and
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that's it and I find that poor people like me and you have more of a drive to get there and prove a point to us and
19:37
other people around us I like what you said I want to pick up on something that you said that you struggled with weight
19:43
you had gained weight obviously as a bodybuilder that probably really sucked too but I think that that is important
19:50
because you made the statement about being arogant just before that and then you talked about your failure and really
19:58
what is another form of recovery for yourself right 100% you know um it was a
20:05
it was a private thing that I wanted to do it was like I've got it just you know it creeps on and creeps on you know and
20:11
before I knew what day it was um 370 18 months ago uh and I I knew I had
20:18
to do something about it so I said hey I want to be the best 63 year old guy that's ever lived and ever been out
20:24
there I want to be goodlook I want to be fit I want to be able to run miles and miles and so I that's what I did I I
20:30
used my own practices of the neuroscience and stuff and I said about it and uh it was pretty easy really you
20:37
know it really was once the mindset see the Mind sits inside the brain you can't touch this guy feel it anything like
20:43
that but it sits inside the brain it's energy hence to saying mind over matter
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the brain's matter what if we could program the mind every morning to run
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that day and have an amazing day well we can see what happens when we wake up in the morning is the subconscious ious brain wakes us up that guy wants to kill
21:01
us and make it look like an accident so this guy's been running most of your life okay there's certain things that we
21:07
teach our guys to do first thing in the morning lack of oxygen subconscious brain Rife oxygen saturation dead
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conscious brain in for the day resets every 24 hours so when you even know that tiny bit of information then you
21:23
know exactly what's going on you you know that this is a possibility
21:29
and that he not just some English guy spouting out some stuff like you will never see me on these show selling my
21:34
services I don't want your business oh you want to go to the foundation great but I I don't need business you know I
21:41
just I take on guys that are going to change the world just like you are because that's what she does con she
21:47
goes out and she finds people who are changing the world in a huge way that's the shows are going on don't care if you got a person or billion people it's not
21:54
the point so as soon as you come up on screen it's like holy [ __ ] oh my God he's my guy thanks apprciate alpha males
22:02
recognize alpha males and together we can change the world I I love that I what I wanted what
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I want to do is I'd love to kind of again you know you're I don't think you're worried about this but but kind
22:16
of explain what you do and H and walk me through walk me through some of that and
22:23
I don't know whether it makes sense to actually ask me questions and walk me through a little bit of it kind of to
22:28
ask to do that um you know I'm not trying to get a free session with you but that you know I I'm just looking for
22:35
a way to to Really Walk The Listener through what some of this looks like
22:40
I've been doing some mindset stuff lately I've got a good friend of mine that we work on some different things it's probably different methodology than
22:47
you but I'm at a I'm at a place where I want to make my I'm 50 about to be 52 in
22:52
December I I am convinced and ready to make my 50s my best decade ever
22:59
um I've had some great successes I've had great failures I'm not where I want to be with my business with this maxed
23:05
out man project with you know even my marriage which is amazing almost you know over 29 years all of those things
23:14
but I'm not quite where I want to be but I know that I have the potential to do almost anything exactly and that's why
23:20
most people are that comt was they tried everything else and there's something missing they know there's something missing it's easy out program it's 1
23:28
hour a day either via tell health or here in the offices one hour a day that's all it is for 90 days what we do
23:34
doing that process is obviously we find out who you are and then we go back to each others and we find out that trauma
23:41
that something happened here that's happening here and you can't correlate we use tools like brain spotting sematic
23:46
experience 9d breath work therapy psychology Behavioral Science all the
23:52
stuff put together in a program that will get you to where you want to be but the idea is is when you come along
23:59
everyone says I don't have childhood trauma well this is why we do okay you
24:04
don't know you have it sits in a subconscious brain but the reason why you're here and not here is because of
24:09
what's happened over there so as a as a as a toddler your mom might said hey don't touch the stove it'll burn you we
24:16
touch it ow it burns us we start crying fundamental lesson there as a toddler is whatever mom says is the truth so we
24:23
believe that okay then we believe what that tells us the truth as we go through life we realize that's not true and we
24:29
can't trust everybody so 99% of the brain says what they tell me is the
24:39
truth and then obviously we get up to adult life and it turns around 90% 97%
24:45
something like that uh believes yes but the other 1% or 2% is that guy that
24:51
makes a comment so thousand people you're amazing one person said or no because that 1% is still there so we'll
24:58
incident from a caregiver here that were acting out here most entrepreneurs that
25:04
work with me are scared of failure and scared of success because what would we
25:09
can only take so much failure what would success look like for me and you'll be surprised how many people are not ready
25:15
for that not ready for the next level say well I do a million dollars a year I'm doing pretty good what you had two
25:22
that it's impossible bang there's your problem who put that impossible in your head and then we go back and we Trace
25:28
that child child would try Trace when somebody said it to him even and and you got to surround yourself with the right
25:34
people people are lifting you up every day even this guy listen to this guy Hey
25:39
Kevin he used to be good but that's much now I'm just joking him that guy has got to be gone yeah there's always one
25:45
person around you that wants you to fail in 25 30 years I've been doing this
25:50
always one person in immediate family or friends or want you to fail two kinds of people in this world the people that
25:56
love you for who you are and the people people that want to be you so doing the process as we go through we're clearing
26:03
up all the past and then we we do a lot of subliminal work uh with people so we
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get there subconscious brain Clear the clear the trauma and then what happens is we ignite most days the conscious
26:16
brain so when the pref fundal cortex goes give me an answer give me an answer to this problem the conscious brain
26:21
kicks in and goes holy [ __ ] it's a piece of cake what are you worried about it's easy you've done this before the change
26:27
from the from the 70% to the 100% is life or death for some people that's what we do it's not days
26:35
and days after three months go away we don't want to see you again you know
26:40
we've taught you everything you need to know go and do it and we say to people that come that have no job say to
26:46
parents you know by the time we finish him they have a job have his own apartment car and everything like that and go what he's been in the bedroom for
26:52
five years not doing anything I don't care he's showed me he's ready we're going to take him to the next level and
26:57
you would be a guess secretly how many people that you look up to because
27:03
household names that if I could that's been through this program we're very discreet we're very discreet who we work
27:09
with but it's the difference man and most entrepreneurs I got you like eight businesses I I have four businesses
27:17
we're looking good we're wearing the stuff we're driving the cars you know all stuff like that but deep down inside
27:23
what what's what's perturbing you at midnight when everyone else is asleep that's keeping you that's St because
27:30
most people that are acting at 60% which should be 100 when you go to bed the
27:35
Mind switches on that mind switching on is draining view of anything in the
27:41
future that you could do so you have to quiet that mind down and that comes with making lists to do having goals for the
27:48
day milestones for the day making sure we're checking stuff off through the day and you're seeing a better you every
27:54
single day because here's if I'm going to do a caption right now to tell everyone what it's about it would be
27:59
this 300 neurop Pathways there are billions 300 neuro Pathways die every
28:05
day in the brain what are you replacing them with that's it that's what we do we
28:13
rewire brains we recircuit patents and you have no choice but to be that person
28:19
that you should always be no choices so you don't have a choice would you come and and go Dr Rob I'm I'm all yours I just do whatever you tell me I'm going
28:25
to do Choice you'll do it do any BNC will [Music] follow
28:31
that's that's amazing I I do and it's funny because I was actually having this conversation yesterday about like in my
28:38
life if if I look across my life it's probably 90% there right like I feel like and it's really probably more like
28:44
50% there but you know I've been super blessed to be able to feed into the
28:49
lives of tons of men from all around the world and all walks of life and I'm very
28:55
excited to announce that I do have a couple spots available right now if you're interested in working with me and
29:01
we can talk about pretty much anything marriage business fitness parenting being a dad uh dogs cars whatever you
29:08
want to talk about I'm available to do that we want to focus on the things that may be most beneficial to you and some
29:14
things that you may not even know would be beneficial to you you've listened to the podcast you kind of know my style if
29:20
you are interested in working with me I want to try to make it as simple as possible but I also want to make sure we're a good fit send an email to
29:27
coaching at max out man.com and just give me two pieces of information why you would like to work with me and what
29:35
that might mean for you what things you would hope to accomplish by meeting with me that'll kick off the process I'll
29:40
reach back out to you we can jump on a call and see whether or not it would be a good fit so go to maxed out man.com
29:46
coaching MaxOut man.com send me an email uh with those two pieces of information
29:51
and we'll see if it's a good fit and I hope it is and I hope that we can actually connect one of my biggest
29:57
struggles the conver ation I was having is this constant like and I'll just call it the cash flow Loop the cash flow fear
30:03
Loop right so as an entrepreneur I have a certain ex you know I have X number of dollars in the bank that's my cash flow
30:09
that's my cash available and then I compare that constantly with Revenue numbers right so this week was up but
30:17
what about what what about next week right what does next week look and I my assumption is that that is what's
30:22
driving me to continue not to have you know the success I want you know I we
30:30
one of my businesses is in the automotive space we sell automotive detailing products and and different
30:35
things so covid fake economy was amazing for us because everybody was home spending quote unquote free
30:42
money so our revenues down from that and you know things are things are okay but
30:47
they're not where we want them to be I think this business can be a million two million three million business nowhere
30:53
near that right now 100% but it's that Loop yeah right that I constantly go
30:59
like I don't have that Loop when I think about my wife and my marriage and my kids and my you know home and all those
31:04
things but this is the loop that gets me and that's what happens at night right
31:11
let me tell you let me tell you what's going on perfect example thank you for sharing that Kevin with me the part of your brain is called the basil ganglia
31:17
now the basil ganglia is with most people are broken especially with people coming up through the trauma and stuff
31:23
like that we're broken and there a reset button on there this is what happens so when we let's say it's a repetition
31:29
strength and confirms part of the brain like driving a car first time awkward two months later reverse down the
31:35
driveway waving to your girlfriend text in listen to music all at the same time it's a working part of their mind the
31:40
basil gu just pick that up with people like you Kevin what happens is Imagine
31:46
The Clock face at 10 after things are going well home's going well looking good at 20 after you're doing some deals
31:52
that's amazing that month's of raing at 22 oh my God we've had a great month that's what forward to next year next
31:58
month and the next month you self sabotage because of something in the past so you you're happy with because
32:06
you have a control over any finances you want you can earn whatever you want to do everyone I mean that's simple it's
32:11
not simple if you you don't know it's like crazy how can you say that but it is of us have done that but something at
32:18
10 to the hour is driving you back to that poverty driven mind where you don't
32:23
deserve it so as crazy as it may seems to you you will self SA some business
32:28
deals without you knowing yourself Sav you think I've done my bet no you haven't and you've walked into that
32:34
mindset going you know something I I can't do this or hey we've had a great month You're Expecting the next month to not be so
32:42
great it's like somebody's put that there so the idea is finding who it is and moving you on uh I mean again for me
32:49
it's simple uh but it is it's not just you know mindset I got I went to a
32:55
conference once and I was only speaking so I went yeah say you want to be a millionaire who's a millionaire what the
33:02
is that about what write down you bet what and this guy was getting paid for
33:07
this [ __ ] I'm like that isn't gonna work well I get the same crowd every year
33:13
what does that tell you TR his full stream and it give some give real stuff where people are going
33:19
to achieve their goals that is attainable and will also carry them through so you have to re re reprogram
33:27
that part the brain so there's no self- sabotage in it tend to you have to hit the amydala these are the three parts of
33:33
the brain that differ the amydala with all that trauma [ __ ] that you carry that you don't know it's trauma and then the
33:38
hypothalamus the hypothalamus is our survival part of the brain from birth it tells us to drink water eat food but
33:45
with with some people especially alcoholic it turns round and either tells them to drink alcohol or self
33:51
sabotage to survive Kevin to survive so when you you're going to sell sabotage
33:57
and the hypothalamus which the only part major part it plays is telling you how to stay alive make sure you eat this
34:05
this otherwise you'll die okay what most people in your situation the hypothalamus says make sure you fail
34:10
this month it'll keep you alive and that mindset is subconscious so you don't know what he's
34:17
happening but you come here there I bet I could go through every business right now and tell you it's a$1 million business and you're not stupid I just
34:23
look at you and know you got your [ __ ] together you're StreetWise I don't like the word hustling but we both know not what it means you got to do that [ __ ]
34:29
you know it's just like there's that part of the brain like keeps going uhuh no we can't go there and that's what
34:35
happens most entrepreneurs is they they put the brakes on their imagination because they don't think they're worthy
34:42
to be worthy you have to be blonde enough tall enough thin enough and Rich enough it's just not true somebody's put
34:48
that there people told me for a long time if money would make you happy when you buy your first por GT when you find
34:54
yeah yeah got it no good when you buy your yeah when I get million yeah get 10 million yeah done all that doesn't make
35:00
me happy I had to work on me with somebody else working on me to get to
35:05
the point now money is is never my problem hasn't been for 10 years I have to worry about that stuff and I have a
35:12
lot of stuff today Kevin that very few people have and that is enough I have
35:19
enough when you're in that state of mind then you can work with other people get to get them there to that state of mind
35:25
I always tell people if money is your objective you never make enough I mean just that's it's just such
35:31
a moving Target and it's doesn't make you happy like people say I mean there's a certain level of comfort right like
35:38
that's you know it it's better than being destitute I've be pooring rich and I
35:43
choose Rich every time don't get right yeah I don't think anybody out there is is choosing poor if they have
35:50
the have the choice I you know I'm going to just continue to full disclosure but but one of the challenges I I think I
35:57
have and I think a lot of people have is I'm aware of my childhood traumas like I have I've most of them let's say I'm
36:05
sure there's some that I don't but I've almost told myself that I've worked through them I've I've come through them
36:13
I'm okay with him and that kind of thing and I'm not really like a oh well my mom made me do this or because she was this
36:20
and all that stuff like I don't I don't do that is that something that you is see as pretty common with people yeah
36:27
yeah they're looking for the big trauma well never Christ my parents never got divorced it's like it's like a million
36:33
time deeper than that that that's happened to you uh but yeah we we see that a lot you know first people say I
36:39
got no trauma I'm like well what do you do I'm an entrepreneur what's your yearly income about 200 Grand a year
36:44
yeah you have drama everybody has it but it's not like you think it is so most
36:50
people come to us with that mindset is I I know what trauma have been through well if you know what trauma that's not
36:56
the [ __ ] that's holding you back unfortunately that's the stuff you've dealt with you know why aren't you in
37:03
your business you know and I'm saying this to the clients and patients out there why aren't you the top of your
37:08
industry well J that it's an excuse give me a reason why you aren't running who's your competitor blah blah blah how much
37:15
did you take five million year okay why are you not taking six and seven well they've been around it's an excuse give
37:21
me a reason and they can't give me a reason because that basil gangle is broken and subconsciously again I got
37:26
keep telling you this Kevin subconsciously revert back to what people have told us and our surroundings and and all of a sudden when you get
37:32
start getting wealthy you know the Imposter syndrome comes in if they only found out who I was and that affects
37:38
next month it's crazy how it goes round and round and round and we're just
37:43
chasing so we might might not be chasing the money all the time but we're chasing something and we can never live in the
37:50
now and have enough and when you do get in the now like all the patience has been through it the money will come and
37:57
everything you want will come because you're living in the 24 hours so if you're depressed you're living in the
38:02
past if you're anxious and fearful you're living in the future we've only gotten out I used to hate it when people
38:08
said that you've only gotten out and you don't have time you don't have time guys
38:14
and how do we know everything I say we've tested researched in Laboratories hospitals scientific researchers we've
38:21
science is everything we went to uh care homes with people that we know or with
38:26
families and we're allowed to ask a dying patient one question if there was
38:32
something you're going to tell another human being right now what would he be and nine out of 10 people says I thought I had more
38:38
time we don't guys moms or or dads one minute I'm waving them off to
38:43
kindergarten the next minute they say they're waving them off to co you don't have time date that girl buy that house
38:50
start that Empire today don't wait till tomorrow we have a 7.3 second rule in this company that if you think of
38:56
something or you want to be or you set yourself and do it you've got to move towards it in the first 7.3 seconds
39:02
otherwise it does not get done so if I'm on the couch tonight I got a big bag of chips big can of Coke I'm sat there in
39:09
my pajamas and I turn around to my wife and say I think I might go to the gym tomorrow I ain't going to the gym
39:14
tomorrow I know it she know the bloody dogs know I'm not going to the gym tomorrow but with that 7.3 second time
39:21
frame if I put the stuff down walk into the bedroom get the sneakers and the top and the shorts put it in my car or near
39:27
the door there's a good chance because I've stepped towards that idea or dream instead of sitting back and going well
39:34
I'm going to do what I'm going to do because there you're in the comfort zone no Champions are born in the comfort
39:39
zone man nobody you got to take what you know and turn it into what you look you
39:44
got to forget about the money the money will come always every single time every single time it'll come start concentrating on what you're good at in
39:50
this world and capitalize on what you're going to so all the crap out is going to hold you back because it will and the
39:58
person go I don't know why it's holding me back it's like when we start getting down to the work you go holy [ __ ] right
40:05
I thought this had nothing to do with it yeah it does just the way they mind and
40:10
brain work and is that the logistic side like you know I'm I'm a you know pragmatic and and all that so I when
40:17
someone says Hey anything's possible you can make as much money as you want you can do all those things right like I
40:23
believe that but then the other part of my brain says yeah but how do I do it how like there's some steps that have to
40:30
be taken to make that happen right like I mean I'm pretty well set up with my
40:35
business processes and those kind of things but I know there's there's levels for improvement is that just a mindset
40:41
that allows me to do the things that I'm doing well already or and to recognize the things I'm not like how does that
40:47
logistic like where does the rubber meet the road so to speak I'm a car guy right depending what it is both it's usually
40:54
in a subconscious brain but one of the questions ask people and I get it all the time Dr Rober just started to
41:01
practice I'm a therapist I'm a doctor I'm how much should I charge an hour well there's your problem you don't know
41:07
your worth that's it so we'll self-sabotage on that or it won't go forward or that
41:13
big meeting I could have with all them directors in that billion dollar
41:18
company really that's what you're telling yourself if and but that's what
41:24
you're telling yourself if you think you can do it your right if you think you can't you're right the mind is so
41:32
powerful when you start against that what we can achieve is
41:38
mindblowing mindblowing but we don't and the the idea is to find why why we don't okay so
41:46
you're you have a car detailing business it takes a million dollars a year but blue shine around the corner he's doing
41:52
$20 million a year my first step would be [ __ ] are they doing that I'm not doing first of all let's find out what
41:59
they're doing and I'm not having well they have 20 years in the industry I don't care if you have a month in the
42:05
industry when you know what you're about your worth your childood traa is sorted out you find out your
42:11
identity it's a big one you really are it's what nothing if you're gonna if
42:18
you're going to head towards a million or pray for a million and D why not 10 well I'm not too sure really if if me
42:26
and you were like listen to this Kevin and I hate to single you out but you're hearing fromont of me if me and you swap
42:32
places right now and you could see you from where I am you would laugh why you
42:38
not taking 20 million a year you would laugh and then you'd hate yourself because you're a million dooll mind I
42:46
can see by Behavioral Science psychology that's my deal you're a million dollar mind but right now you're hanging around
42:53
10 cent lines and stopping you seeing your value and your worth and your identity identity is based on people
43:00
around us hey I see the haircut is amazing there oh yeah it's amazing good that air coach [ __ ] what oh god [ __ ] and
43:07
we take it on and then that becomes internal dialogue once it becomes
43:12
internal dialogue becomes a working part of the Mind the mind and the Brain act the Behavioral Science part of it and
43:19
you are done might well pack up everything now and go home you're either going to do it or you're not I'm the
43:26
best in the world of what I do my company takes I'm the highest paid doctor in Texas the surgeons everything
43:33
neurosci I'm the highest paid doctor in in Texas you know I'm in the 1% of this
43:39
world why did my work I help others I achieve life success keeps me having
43:46
success it keeps me humble and I can pass this [ __ ] on when people don't know it's happening to them it's like why
43:53
you're an All or Nothing guy I can tell just looking at you k Why why aren you all ining this and the question is I
44:00
don't know most I don't know I mean I want I don't know that's the part of the subconscious and the trauma from the
44:06
past and possibly friends around here right now uh that's causing that you know we are the M People we hang around
44:13
with to say you know hang around nine billionaires you will become a billionaire and you'll be the 10 it's a
44:19
it's how we Merit each other's energy and brain so what we did is an experiment
44:25
and I think you'll like this we got 20 people in a room and we told him come along please have coffee we're going to
44:32
wire up here and then obviously the heart was going to monitor some stuff brilliant what they didn't know is we
44:37
had two doctors two mechanics two teachers all mingling we was watching
44:42
what happened when you know like a poor person met a rich people when the mechanic met the doctor okay they really
44:49
had nothing to talk about okay and when the doctor met the doctor so so the Pres
44:54
at the bottom where one uh does serves another okay mechanic and Doctor it went up by 10% doctor meets doctor randomly
45:02
goes up by 20% when a guy who sweeps through streets for a living and a neurosurgeon
45:10
started talking but they were both being authentic with each other it [ __ ] to
45:15
100% so authentication being authentic with each other and knowing who you are
45:21
and what you can provide to this world as a human being that's the gift of life
45:28
knowing you know because me my my parents died some years ago we were over
45:33
there sorting all stuff out and my friend was starting the pictures out and he goes Rob Rob black and white fot
45:39
we're like this bodybuilders you know of our time with 1920 oh my God have you SE
45:44
oh my God look at us oh God look at our waist were so we were so goodlooking man
45:50
it's like yeah he says those were the days man and I stopped and I don't know why and I thought to myself but we
45:56
didn't know those were the days back then mhm what if today's one of those days and that's how I live my life today
46:03
I'm going to look back in 10 years time to this day of speaking to you because I know my work I know how time works I
46:08
know how the brain works I know my identity I know everything about me going forward you know and how I can
46:13
help people and be be just peaceful with me so it also ties into so we don't have
46:18
time and it's like you got to do it now and are you having a good time
46:25
sounds like you're having a good time oh man I I I have everything I want everything I need I have a beautiful
46:30
wife I have two English Bulldogs I got the house on my dreams the cars oh cars listen to me couldn't even afford fuing
46:35
bus pass you know 25 years ago I've the cars are my dreams you know I have practices all over the world with some
46:42
great people I'm I'm a 10 out of 10 every day okay I feel you can't be happy
46:47
all the time says who like you you'll see that around on the internet it says fing you is what the the real thing is
46:54
it's like what why well you just can't Behavior why can't you who's asking why
46:59
is anybody ask these questions me and my wife got married on the second day we're married we had a little argument about nothing and I said I'm not going to do
47:06
this I've done this before aru it's not and she said that's the way marriage is supposed to be and I said says who and
47:12
we looked each other and we thought you know something I don't like these rules we're going to make our own rules up
47:19
we're laugh we're throwing stuff at each other in the bathroom it's like says who who's making these rules up that we live
47:25
in today because they're broken Bren once first of all and secondly you can
47:31
do anything you want you have to have that mindset man I don't care if you sell matches on the side of a road why
47:37
not become the best match seller on the side of the road that owns an Empire why
47:42
not and it's all the stuff we talked about that keeps us from doing I love it um I have on my board and I've said this
47:48
many times on the podcast but my TW my goals are have fun serve others build a
47:54
life right so if I'm if I'm doing that everything else falls into place this has been super great I know you got to
47:59
go um it's been really enriching to me to have this initial conversation with
48:05
you and I can't wait to have additional conversations with you it's a it's a lot of fun and you know you you're just
48:11
you're you're fun to hang out with so I appreciate that I appreciate what you're doing uh if people do want to find out
48:16
more about you go to Rob kelly.com is that the is that the website yeah if if you're just listening not watching I
48:22
spell name to B's r obb k l.com conf frienders all the social medias uh we
48:28
don't want your business however the Rob Kelly foundation.org is a nonprofit we
48:34
just started if you want to give a dollar to that I'll be grateful and that dollar goes to with other money and
48:41
might buy a guy a suit to go to court to get his kid back once a week you will
48:46
get an email from that guy thanking you for that dollar that helped him get to court I love that I love that Dr Rob I
48:53
appreciate you man have a great day you too man thanks very much if you're looking to really maximize
48:59
your life and become the man you were made to be head over to maxed out man.com and get your journey started
49:06
today [Music]